Of late it’s [...]]]> I know I’ve been holding on for a long time. Hoping and hoping and hoping that the naps would continue. That the quiet would continue. That the me time would go on. But alas, I think we’re done. Three years and two months into it and I’m pretty sure we nap no more.

Of late it’s been a battle. Not the act of going into Courtney’s room for nap time, she’s happy to go in there. But staying in and being quiet. Which is really all I want, some quiet. I want Courtney to have some time to rest and recharge. Because really, she needs it. She needs that time when she’s not doing 600 things but maybe one or two, in the confines of her bed, of her four walls. But I’ve taken away the diaper or pullup at nap time so if she needs to go to the bathroom, she has to tell me and I need to come and get her. So she screams. I mean, SCREAMS. This ear-piercing, window shattering, dog-calling scream. And I go RUNNING from where ever I am to make the screams stop because I don’t want her to wake her brother. Or shatter my her eardrums. And inevitably, we get in some type of a thing with me wagging my finger and telling her to Stop. Yelling. This. Minute. Which, of course, only makes her scream more. And louder. It’s a nightmare.

The thing is, she’ll stay in her room (mostly because the door is locked) and play quietly for a while. And maybe that’s all I’ll get. But on the other hand, I also think that Courtney waits and waits and waits UNTIL nap time to go to the bathroom. It’s as though she knows it’s her free ticket. Little devil child, she is…

So as of Friday, we’re going to play it differently. She’s still going to her room but I’m not shutting the door all the way. I’ll leave the light on and the white noise off and if she has to go to the bathroom then have at it. The question then becomes, how long can I expect her to stay there. Probably not long.  I wonder if I were to set an egg timer or something if she’d stay in there until it dings. I wonder if I can set it to go off 5 days later… Wish me luck. I’m sure the force is not with me but we’ll see what happens. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll get enough time to get into the shower and shave BOTH legs as opposed to the 3/4 of one leg I completed yesterday. Now the question for me is when will I shower again AND have the time to shave the rest?

I bring you, the story: This past summer while on vacation, I purchased some “modeling dough.” See, there was a hurricane coming and we were on this fabulous little island and all I could think about was that if we got stranded there we’d need something [...]]]> Loathe. Detest. Despise. I can’t vacuum you up quickly enough.

I bring you, the story: This past summer while on vacation, I purchased some “modeling dough.” See, there was a hurricane coming and we were on this fabulous little island and all I could think about was that if we got stranded there we’d need something to do. And since we hadn’t purchased any food or water or beer at least we’d have overpriced “modeling clay.” It turns out that we got off of said island before the hurricane and we didn’t open the “modeling dough” until at least a month later when Courtney had discovered the joy of it at school. So out came the “modeling clay” and Courtney spent hours and hours and hours entertaining herself and having all kinds of fun. And after every use, we’d put said modeling clay away and it would be excellently squishy for the next session. However, like all flour-made toys, it eventually started to dry out and so, like a complete ignoramus, I asked someone to give Courtney Playdough for Christmas.

Holy hell. Playdough SUCKS. It gets EVERYWHERE. I mean, it crumbles and falls to the floor and sticks to your clothes and to your shoes and WTF, who invented this crap. I mean, GAH! Clearly, some man* invented it because he had no intention of cleaning this crap up so who cares how messy it is, let’s make millions! Don’t get me wrong, I’m no neat freak and my house is NOT out of some magazine but little red playdough pieces all over the damn place are more than I can tolerate.  And while yes, the colors are pretty and the cookie-cutter-shape-doohickeys are fun, the crap still gets EVERYWHERE. And seriously, at this point, I can’t vacuum this stuff up fast enough. The kids leave it out for an hour, oops, look at that, it’s all dry.  Vacuum. Oh look, there’s some on the floor. Vacuum. Oh hey, that container is half empty (that shit is never half full), throw it out. Of the 6 containers Courtney received for Christmas, there’s maybe 3 left. Maybe less…

I’ve already ordered and received my new Modeling Dough ** And I can’t wait to break this out, see ya Playdough.

*Yes, it was a man in 1956 and he CLEARLY wasn’t doing to cleaning then. I mean, I’ve seen TV from the 50′s and I’m sure it was all true with women cooking and cleaning.

** Yes, that is an affiliate link and if you buy it, I’ll get maybe $.06. But seriously, that stuff is the bomb diggity and you’ll love it. Unless you make it yourself and already have a bomb diggity recipe then please share.