It’s like my legs were at the Golden Globes

If you know me, or have read my drivel for long enough, you know I’m kind of lazy.  I hate to admit it but, that includes grooming.  I take a shower almost every day (like 98% of the time), not because I want to but because Paul is horrified if I don’t.  Don’t get me wrong, I LIKE to be clean, I just don’t want to spend time on it.  I’m in and out of the shower in minutes because I have crap to do and I just don’t feel like standing in there all day.  Paul, on the other hand, will stand in there until the hot water is gone.  He’ll stand there and let the hot water run and run and back in the days when I was working, I’d have to yell at him to hurry up so there’d be a drop of hot water left for me.  And that’s usually what there was, a drop.

Now that I’m a SAHM (dad, that stands for stay at home mom), I take really fast showers because I’m on a limited schedule and I definitely don’t have time for more than what’s really required of me.  Sadly for someone (not me, I don’t really care), that usually means I don’t get much shaving done.  Pre-baby, that didn’t really matter much.  My hair grew wonderfully slowly and I could get away with shaving my legs once every couple of months weeks, even in the summer.  Then I got all pregnant and my hormones went wacky and now there’s this leg hair that just won’t quit.  But really, in the winter I don’t care.  No one’s looking at my legs.  It’s not until I’m doing some Shred exercise in the plank pose (damn plank jacks) and I can see the leg hair blowing in the breeze, do I really realize that perhaps I’ve gone a bit too long.  And even then, it may take me a few days because still, I just don’t care.

So imagine my JOY today when I saw that not only do I not shave, neither does Mo’Nique and she’s like, a STAR!!!  She showed up to the Golden Globes in some fabulous full length gown with her fancy hair and makeup and big ol’ high heel shoes and some serious leg hair.  (I guess she’s done this before but I wasn’t paying attention but now I’m all Unite Hairy Legged People!!)  I mean, braid that hair leg hair.  I know we have SO MUCH nothing in common.  She’s rich and famous and won a Golden Globe and has a talk show and I’m poor and unemployed and have no awards on my mantel and write some dumb blog and she’s black and I’m white but we do both have big boobs (I’m an F-cup, ya’ll!!) and we both live in the A-T-L.  And, we both have some hairy ass legs and are in need of some personal grooming, apparently.  (For the record, and mostly because I don’t want you all to be horrified, my leg hair never gets so bad that it would show up on camera like that.)

I would like to think that in the event that I’m on the red carpet at the Golden Globes, I’d not only take the time to get my hair done and put on something other than mascara for makeup, but that I’d shave a leg or two.  I’m just saying.


  1. Jayme says:

    That is awesome! I too do not care to shave my legs. I do not have time in the morning to do it. I would rather sleep in! I only shaved them this morning because I was hoping to have some “alone time” with the hubs tonight or this weekend… I actually showed him the awesomeness of my leg hair last night and he almost barfed! Unfortunately, I have very dark leg hair and it is quite lovely to see the man hair that has manifested on my legs. I just hope I didn’t clog the drain this morning after all of the shaving!

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