This little piggy

This swine flu thing is making me nuts.  At first I couldn’t decide if I should get the vaccine for Courtney and/or myself.  And then I decided I would but I couldn’t find the damn thing. And now that I can’t find it, I’m obsessed and super irritated.  It’s like the golden ticket.  You search and search and search (and eat 8000 chocolate bars in the process) and then some dumb gum chewing girl standing RIGHT in front of you in line gets it and you don’t.  And she just dangles it under your nose, taunting you with her swine flu-less self, and you sneeze right in her face.  Damn shot.

So I started calling my doctor and Courtney’s doctor.  And no one has had it.  But I’m hearing on the news that the vaccine has shipped and I should be able to find it.  And I’m hearing from my friends that their pediatrician has it or that they were able to get it from their counties health departments.  My county is giving it to kids and young adults from ages 2 – 24.  That’s not me.  Or Courtney.  And asking “do you have it?” seems to differ depending on the day of the week, the stage of the moon, and what county you live in.  What. The. Hell.

Now that we’re back in town, I called the pediatrician this morning.  They have it.  FINALLY.

And I called my doctor.  They have it.  But I can’t get it.  Courtney is too old and I’m not pregnant.  And not the right age.  My pig stars don’t align so I can’t get the shot.

I called my OB.  They have it but are only giving it to pregnant women.  I’m not pregnant.  “But we’re trying to get pregnant.” Sorry, that doesn’t count. Awesome.  And what if, by the time I get pregnant, they don’t have it anymore.

Although, they’re making more, right?

I know that not all people think they should get it for either themselves or their children.  And I respect that.  But for me and my family, I think it’s really important.  Children are dying.  I can’t allow that to happen to my baby.  Every day I do everything I can to keep her safe.  I put her in the car seat and strap her in.  Tight.  I don’t allow her to stick her tongue in the outlet, no matter how hard she tries.  I don’t let her eat foods that could potentially harm her, even though I think the odds are low.  I don’t let her go up and down the stairs by herself.  I don’t allow her to play with sick kids, if I can help it.  I’m going to follow the CDC’s guidelines for vaccines because there’s no way my girl is going to die from the mumps.  I can’t protect Courtney from everything, I know that.  And sometimes she’s going to get hurt.  But if I can avoid dangers, I will.

As for me, well, I don’t want to get sick.  I’m pretty sure that if I got the swine flu, I probably wouldn’t die from it.  It would suck for a few days but I’d most likely live to tell about it.  But, unlike the regular flu, swine flu has no season.  And let’s say I do get pregnant today, in 40 weeks I’d have a baby who has no antibodies to protect him/her from the swine flu.  And that little baby couldn’t get a shot until he/she was 6 months old.  What if I got the swine flu while that baby wasn’t protected?  What if I gave my baby the flu and something horrific happened?  How would I live with myself?

There are people out there who need the shot, much more than I do.  And they should get it.  But, I’m going to keep trying to find the shot for myself.  I’ll keep calling the doctor.  I’ll keep checking the counties web site.  Maybe I’ll borrow my friend’s ID in a different county so I can get it there.  Hell, maybe I’ll even go and get pregnant.  Who knows.  But in the mean time, I’m staying away from pigs, sick kids, cats, and big crowds.  I guess I’ll just stay home for the next 4 months.